In this holiday season, because it is a festive time of year, I realize some of the young men may be thinking about romance with the young ladies and vice versa. Although I don’t have a daughter, I would like to share a bit of avuncular advice for the young ladies, hoping that young ladies will read this and take heart, or that people reading this who do have daughters will share this post with them.
I read somewhere, I think on Facebook, a line something like “don’t marry the life of the party, marry the one who makes sure that the life of the party gets home safely.” Following up on this, first with a story…
Actions Speak Louder Than Words
A couple that I know who have been married for a while, let’s call them John and Jane – while they were still dating, on some occasion like Valentines Day or a birthday, a day when it is normal for a man to give his girlfriend a gift – John gave Jane a toolkit and showed her how to use these tools to maintain and fix her vehicle. Jane complained to her sister “ugh, this guy is sooo unromantic.” Her sister responded “Jane, hang on to this guy, he is a good man who will take real good care of you.”
Ladies, when your boyfriend fixes your car, or keeps it stocked with a first aid kit and such in case of emergency; when he fixes your computer; when he installs a new bookshelf for you – that’s love. When he does some home repairs in your parents’ home, or he offers to drive your parent to the hospital or doctor’s office for an appointment – that’s love. If you happen to be dating a soldier or Marine or similar, if he gives you a weapon (not necessarily a firearm), teaches you how to use it, and tells you to keep it handy so that you can defend yourself against a violent criminal; or if he teaches you martial arts for the same reason – that’s love.
When your man does things like this for you, he is saying “I love you” in a very distinct yet quiet way. This sort of love is more true and genuine than giving chocolates, flowers, or jewelry, even though it may not be exciting and romantic in the way that ladies often prefer.
If you’d like me to share more of this sort of life wisdom with your student over a cup of coffee while helping them study math or science, then book a NO COST trial lesson today.